Tapping about Cheese

 

The first time I started doing EFT by myself was a couple years ago.  I bought the "EFT for Weight loss" booklet and read through it.  One thing it suggested was write down all memories that you feel may have contributed to overeating and gaining unhealthy weight.  So I did.  It was long. 

 

After writing out my list, the book instructed to just start from the top and start tapping the memories out.  One point it made was to pay attention to where your mind goes as your tap.  If an emotion or memory comes into your mind go with it.  So I did.  While Jared was out of town and I had the evening to myself, I spent 45 minutes or so tapping.  The following is a portion of what I tapped through (I get pretty personal. It is my hope that by being open, my experience will be a blessing to you):

 

As many girls can attest, high school is rough. When I was in 9th grade (age 15), I was a pretty cute girl.  I had a nice figure.  I was aware of this because boys were commenting all the time.  To a point that it made me uncomfortable.  How would you feel if a boy walked up to you and told you to bend over (my nickname was ghetto booty)? My reaction was usually telling them off and walking away (which bothered me too because I knew they were staring at my butt.  So annoying!)
 



Well, there was a breaking point where I was put in a very compromising situation.  Unbeknownst to anyone in my family, while my brother's friend spent the night and while everyone was asleep, he came into my room and crawled in bed with me.  I didn't have the maturity or guts to scream.  I assumed I'd get into trouble.  He was pawing at me and I was doing everything I could to get him out without making a fuss.  I don't want to leave the impression that he was trying to rape me.  But he was 19 and accustom to a girl being much more "free".  Not me.  By the worlds standard, it would be considered a harmless make out.  For me, I felt used and an object.  After 3 attempts and locking my door, he left me alone. 

 

So I tapped out that experience.  I was surprised by how much emotion it brought up.  Feelings of being not seen for me, not heard, no one protecting me, not respected, feeling worthless and on and on.  I recalled having the distinct thought that I didn't want boys liking me for my body anymore.  It was a somewhat conscious decision.  I stopped dressing cute.  I just focused on my personality.  There were a couple wonderful guys that I liked a lot and they liked me but I pushed them away because I didn't feel worthy of them. 

 





 

While tapping this out, I had a random memory of changing my after school snack around this time.  Typically I would eat oranges and carrots like crazy after school.  Then it went to quesadillas.  It started with one and it grew to 3 or 4.  Gross, huh?  It was like I was trying to numb myself for the pain I felt.  I tapped about the quesadillas and the emotions I felt surrounding those memories of eating them during that time.  It was wild.  I had a physiology response to the tapping, the taste of cheese came into my mouth and it made me gag.  When I finished tapping this out.  I no longer wanted cheese.  It no longer served its purpose in my life anymore. 

 

Up until this tapping experience, cheese had been something I craved whenever I was stressed or feeling insecure.  Now it is just there.  For awhile, I wanted nothing to do with it.  I've come to a point where I appreciate the flavor but I don't crave it anymore.

 

Now I just need to tap out sugar and bread!!! That may take a couple hours.  Or more. :)